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And that disparity tends not to even out over time. In general, men can manage wanting what they already have, while women struggle with it. Marta Meana of the University of Nevada at Las Vegas spelled it out simply in an interview with me at the annual Society for Sex Therapy and Research conference in Somehow I, along with nearly everyone else I knew, was stuck on the idea that women are in it for the cuddles as much as the orgasms, and—besides—actually require emotional connection and familiarity to thrive sexually, whereas men chafe against the strictures of monogamy.

But when the researchers controlled for that variable, it turned out to have no impact. Read: Multiple lovers, without jealousy. Many women want monogamy. The psychiatrist and sexual-health practitioner Elisabeth Gordon told me that in her clinical experience, as in the data, women disproportionately present with lower sexual desire than their male partners of a year or more, and in the longer term as well.

The wife's relations at ays raise as many horses or other property for her dower as the bridegroom has sent. In Patagonia the usual custom is for the bridegroom, after he has secured the consent of his damsel, to send either a brother or some intimate friend to the parents, offering so many mares, horses, or silver ornaments for the bride. If the parents consider the match desirable, as soon after as circumstances will permit, the bridegroom, dressed in his best, and mounted on his best horse, proceeds to the toldo of his intended, and hands over the gifts; the parents then return gifts of equivalent value, which, however, in the event of a separation are the property of the bride.

Marriage by capture is an immediate expression of male force. This form of obtaining a wife has been very widespread, and, like marriage by settlement in the house of the wife, is an expedient for obtaining a wife outside the group where marriage by purchase is not developed, or where the suitor cannot offer property for the bride.

It is an unsocial procedure and does not persist in a growing society, for it involves retaliation and blood feud. But it is a desperate means of avoiding the constraint and embarrassment of a residence in the family and among the relatives of the wife, where the power of the husband is hindered, and the male disposition is not satisfied in this matter short of personal ownership. The man also sometimes lives under the maternal system in regular marriage, but escapes its disadvantages by stealing a supplementary wife or purchasing a slave woman, over whom and whose children he has full authority.

In the Babar archipelago, where the maternal system persists even in the presence of marriage by purchase, and the man lives in the house of the woman, and the children are reckoned with the mother, it is considered highly honorable to steal an additional wife from another group, and in this case the children belong to the father. To the same effect, among the Wanyamwesi, south of the Victoria Nyanza, the children of a slave wife inherit, to the exclusion of children born of legal wife.

And husbands among the Fellatahs are in the habit of adopting children, though they may have sons or daughters of their own, and the adopted children inherit the property. But he may later carry her forcibly to his own group, and the children then belong to him. Bosman relates that in Guinea religious symbolism was also introduced by the husband to reinforce and lend dignity to this action. The maternal system held with respect to the chief wife:. It was customary, however, for a man to buy and take to wife a slave, a friendless person with whom he could deal at pleasure, who had no kindred that could interfere for her, and to consecrate her to his Bossum or god.

The Bossum wife, slave as she had been, ranked next to the chief wife, and was like her exceptionally treated. She alone was very jealously guarded, she alone was sacrificed at her husband's death. She was, in fact, wife in a peculiar sense. And having, by consecration, been made of the kindred and worship of her husband, her children would be born of his kindred and worship.

Altogether the most satisfactory means of removing a girl from her group is to purchase her. The use of property in the acquisition of women is not a particular expression of the male nature, since property is accumulated by females as well, but where this form of marriage exists it means practically that the male relatives of the girl are using her for profit, and that her suitor is seeking more complete control of her than he can gain in her group, and viewed in this light the purchase and sale of women is an expression of the dominant nature of the male.

In consequence of purchase woman became in barbarous society a chattel, and her socially constrained position in history and the present. The simplest form of purchase is to give a woman in exchange. On the island of Serang a youth belongs to the family of the girl, living according to her customs and religion until the bride price is paid.

He then takes both wife and children to his tribe.

But in case he is very poor, he never pays the price, and remains perpetually in the tribe of his wife. The suitor sends a messenger with blankets, and the number sent is doubled within three months, making in all about one hundred and fifty. These are to be returned later.

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He is then allowed to live with the girl in her father's house. Three months later the husband gives perhaps a hundred blankets more for permission to take his wife home. So long as a wife remained in her group, she could rely upon her kindred for protection against ill-usage from her husband, but she forfeited this advantage when she passed to his group. An Arabian girl replies to her father, when a chief seeks her in marriage: "No!

I am not fair of face, and I have infirmities. When the parents of the man and woman meet to settle the price of the woman, the price depends on how many days in the week the marriage tit is to be strictly observed. The woman's mother first of all proposes that, taking everything into consideration, with a due regard for the feelings of the family, she could not think of binding her daughter to a due observance of that chastity which matrimony is expected to command for more than two days in the week.

After a great deal of apparently angry discussion, and the promise on the part of the relatives of the man to pay more, it is arranged that the marriage shall hold good, as is customary among the first families of the tribe, for four days in the week, viz. We may understand also that the tolerance of loose conduct in girls before marriage, a tolerance which amounts in many tribes to approval, is due to the tribal recognition of the value of children, and children born out of marriage are added to tile family of the mother.

When, on the other hand, the conduct of girls is strictly watched, this is from a consideration that virgins command a higher bride price. Child marriages and long betrothals are means of guaranteeing the proper conduct of a girl to her husband, as they constitute a personal claim and afford him an opportunity to throw more restrictions about her. A social grouping which is not the product of forces more active in their nature than the reproductive force may be expected to yield before male motor activities, when these are for any reason sufficiently formulated.


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The primitive warrior and hunter comes into honor and property through a series of movements involving judgments of time and space, and the successful direction of force, aided by mechanical appliances and mediated through the hand and the eye. Whether directed against the human or the animal world, the principle is the same; success and honor, and influence in tribal life, depend on the application of violence at the proper time, in the right direction, and in sufficient measure; and this is preeminently the business of the male.

The advantage of acting in concert in war and hunting, and under the leadership of those who have shown evidence of the best judgment in these matters, is felt in any body of men who are held together by any tie, and the first tie is the tie of blood, by which we should understand, not that primitive man has any sentimental feeling about kinship, but that he is psychologically inseparable from those among whom he was born and with whom he has to do.

Though the father's sense of kinship and interest in his children is originally feeble, it increases with the growth of consciousness in connection with various activities, and, at the point in race development when chieftainship is hereditary in the clan and personal property is recognized, the father feels the awkwardness of a social system which reckons his children as members of another clan and forces him to bequeath his rank and possessions to his sisters' children, or other members of his own group, rather than to his children.

The Navajoes [55] and Nairs, [56] and ancient Egyptians [57] avoided this unpleasant condition by giving their property to their children during their own lifetime, and the Shawnees, Miamis, Sauks, and Foxes avoided it by naming the children into the clan of the father,. The children might then be regularly reckoned as of the kin of the mother, indeed, but they were at the same time of and in the group of the father, and the king secured the succession of his own son by marrying the woman whose son would traditionally succeed.

As we should expect, the desirability of modifying the system of descent and inheritance through females is felt first in connection with situations of honor and profit. At the time of the discovery of the Hawaiian islands the government was a brutal despotism, presenting many of the features of feudalism; the people prostrated themselves before the king and before objects which he had touched, and a man suffered- death whose shadow fell upon the king, or who went uncovered within the shadow of the king's house, or even looked upon the king by day.

Wilkes states that there was formerly no regularly established order of succession to the throne; the children of the chief wile had the best claim, but the king often named his own successor, and this gave rise to violent conflicts. Blood-brotherhood, blood-vengeance, secret societies, tribal marks totemism, circumcision, tatooing, scarification , and religious dedication, are devices by which, consciously or unconsciously, the men escape from the tyranny of the maternal system.

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We cannot assume that these practices originate solely or largely in dissatisfaction, for the men would feel the advantage of a combination of interests whenever brought into association. In West Africa and among some of the negro tribes the initiatory ceremony is apparently deliberately hostile to the maternal organization. The youth is taken from the family of his mother and symbolically killed and buried, and resurrected by the priests into a male organization, and dedicated to his father's god.

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Spatial conditions have played an important role in the development of societies. Through movements the individual or the group is able to pick and choose advantageous relations, and by changing its location adjust itself to changes in the food conditions.

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That the success of the group is definitely related to its motor capacity is revealed by the following law of population, worked out by statisticians for the three predominant races of modern Europe: In countries inhabited jointly by these three races, the race possessing the smallest portion of wealth and the smallest representation among the more influential and educated classes constitutes also the least migratory element of the population, and tends in the least degree to concentrate in the cities and the more fertile regions of the country; and in countries inhabited jointly by the three races, the race possessing the largest portion of wealth and the largest representation among the more influential and educated classes is also the.

The leadership of these mass movements and spatial reaccommodations necessarily rests with the men, who, in their wanderings, have become acquainted with larger stretches of space, and whose specialty is motor coordination. The progressive races have managed the space problem best. At every favorable point they have pushed out their territorial boundaries or transferred their social activities to a region more favorable to their expansion.

Under male leadership, in consequence, territory has become the prize in every conflict of races, the modern state is based not on blood but on territory, and territory is at present the reigning political ideal. In the process of coming into control of a larger environment through the motor activities of the male, the group comes into collision with other groups within which the same movement is going on, and it then becomes a question which group can apply force more destructively and remove or bring under control this human portion of its environment.

Military organization and battle afford the grand opportunity for the individual and mass expression of the superior force-capacity of the male. They also determine experimentally which groups and which individuals are superior in this respect, and despotism, caste, and slavery are concrete expressions of the trial.


The nominal headship of woman within the maternal group existed only in default of forms of activity fit to formulate headship among the men, and when chronic militancy developed an organization among the males, the political influence of the female was completely shattered. At a certain point in history women became an unfree class, precisely as slaves became an unfree class - because neither class showed a superior fitness on the motor side; and each class is regaining its freedom because the race is substituting other forms of decision for violence.

This question can be asked for several reasons.

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